In my life, I have known so many people that have trouble prioritizing their lives and lack any sort of realistic approach to the number of hours in a day. Day to day they are constantly on the move, trying to accomplish everything that everyone expects of them. They want to do it all - to be all things to all people. Their friends, family, lovers, and all the rest. It's admirable, but somehow in all of that sea of swiftness, they forsake the time that they used to take for themselves.
One person I know did this for years, and then one day she got very sick and almost died. Everyone that I have ever met that has almost died has a completely different perspective on life than everyone that hasn't. She now took time for the most simple things - enjoying a sunrise, relaxing, and taking time for herself. "God wanted me to slow down."
When I was the one running around and trying to accomplish everything under the sun in a day, I would sometimes make myself sick. She would always look at me and repeat her familiar refrain, "Well what did you expect? God wants you to take a break. You aren't really going to win the argument."
"But I like doing all of these things. They are important to me."
"When did you stop being important to you? You need a break. You need your downtime and your time for personal reflection. Do you think it's any wonder Europeans are, as a whole, healthier than us? Vienna waits for you." You can pretty much convince me of anything if you have a Billy Joel song to support your point.
"But it's not like I don't want to do these things."
"No one is doubting your sincerity or your passion for your commitments or your friends. However, your priorities need a little work. You have to remember that your needs should come in on that list higher than they seem to be falling. Being there for others is very important, but being there for yourself is often more important. It's alright, you can afford to lose a day or two."
In my life, I have learned that time is the most valuable commodity we all have, and choosing how we spend that time is perhaps one of the most difficult balancing acts ever - with friends, interests, lovers, family, work, and a million of other things drawing on us. We often instinctively want to do it all - to be all things to all people, but as Aunt Mae said in Spider-Man, "You aren't Superman, you know." Any time you pick up another activity, another interest, another friend, job, lover, whatever, you are drawing from the most finite resource you have, and this should never be done to the detriment of yourself. You have to make sure there is enough you time at the end of the day. Figuring out the things that are most important in your life and making sure your needs are being met are very key to the entire process of living.
One person I know did this for years, and then one day she got very sick and almost died. Everyone that I have ever met that has almost died has a completely different perspective on life than everyone that hasn't. She now took time for the most simple things - enjoying a sunrise, relaxing, and taking time for herself. "God wanted me to slow down."
When I was the one running around and trying to accomplish everything under the sun in a day, I would sometimes make myself sick. She would always look at me and repeat her familiar refrain, "Well what did you expect? God wants you to take a break. You aren't really going to win the argument."
"But I like doing all of these things. They are important to me."
"When did you stop being important to you? You need a break. You need your downtime and your time for personal reflection. Do you think it's any wonder Europeans are, as a whole, healthier than us? Vienna waits for you." You can pretty much convince me of anything if you have a Billy Joel song to support your point.
"But it's not like I don't want to do these things."
"No one is doubting your sincerity or your passion for your commitments or your friends. However, your priorities need a little work. You have to remember that your needs should come in on that list higher than they seem to be falling. Being there for others is very important, but being there for yourself is often more important. It's alright, you can afford to lose a day or two."
In my life, I have learned that time is the most valuable commodity we all have, and choosing how we spend that time is perhaps one of the most difficult balancing acts ever - with friends, interests, lovers, family, work, and a million of other things drawing on us. We often instinctively want to do it all - to be all things to all people, but as Aunt Mae said in Spider-Man, "You aren't Superman, you know." Any time you pick up another activity, another interest, another friend, job, lover, whatever, you are drawing from the most finite resource you have, and this should never be done to the detriment of yourself. You have to make sure there is enough you time at the end of the day. Figuring out the things that are most important in your life and making sure your needs are being met are very key to the entire process of living.
I LOVE BILLY JOEL! Ha. Had to share.
ReplyDeleteA. I found you through Greek Tragedy, I unfortunately lied the other day :)
B. "You have to learn to pace yourself... " (pressure)! If someone had Billy lyrics to support it, i'd prob cave too..but dont tell my friends!!
Why do you think flight safety instructions tell you to secure your own oxygen mask before assisting others? If you have taken care of yourself first, there is so much more of you available to give to others.
ReplyDeleteHey how did you get your archives to go like that?
ReplyDeleteOh my god ... I love this post, and I needed it so desperately. I can relate completely to the argument that I love everything that I am doing, so why should I give it up ... but that is what is killing me. I wake up exhausted every morning and unable to unwind when I get home at night. THANK YOU for this post, as I am so ready to make big changes in this regard.
ReplyDeleteMandi ~ Thanks. I think many of us need to be reminded of this on occasion.
ReplyDeleteSarah ~ So many blogs, so little time. :-) Yeah, Peter Pan advice doesn't often work in the real world.
Jen ~ I love that your analogy even has to do with aviation. :-) I think you should be a pilot.
Kiki ~ It's part of the new template in Blogger Beta. You'll have the same features soon.
We ~ I'm glad I could help. I hope you take the time you need.
You are very right, J. It's hard to hold on to the impact of a life-threatening event permanently, but it is a profound experience.
ReplyDeleteYou're also right that we need to take care of ourselves and not just others, of course. I have to work on Saturday, but my husband and I are just VEGGING this weekend other than that. Relaxation. Ahhh.
By the way, Billy Joel is one of my favorite songwriters. I loves him.
i actually had this same conversaion w/ a co-worker yesterday...
ReplyDeleteunfortunatly for her, she experienced a lot of tragedy this summer....
unfortunatly for me - i am still making myself sick overdoing and wearing on my own nerves
Sometimes it does take something serious to make us think about what really matters. It took a move to nyc for me to realize what was really important to me. I've been on vacation this week and it's given me the time to think and sort out my priorities. I bought a plane ticket home last night and I leave in 2 weeks.
ReplyDelete