I'm superficial. It's very sad, I'm sure, but I simply cannot get over certain things with women. I don't like fat women; a little heavy, I have no issue, or if they can compensate with a great face, no problem, but if all they've got is a lot of extra cheeseburgers, I just can't get into them. I'm sorry. I wish I could. Believe me, it would make my life a whole lot easier if I could, but I can't. I can't help sitting there thinking, gosh, is it so hard to get to a gym? Maybe if I was fat or didn't go to the gym consistently, I would over look this more, but I'm not and I do.
Dumb women, I can't stand them either. I don't think I'm exceptionally smart. I'm pretty sure there are a lot of people out there much smarter than I, but I hate communicating with a woman when all I can think of is how poorly they speak, write, or communicate. I'll be sitting there wanting to runaway and escape as quickly as possible. Praying that they are really smart on the inside, and that they are just nervous. A woman can be absolutely gorgeous, and then they open their mouth and you spend the rest of the night together wishing that they hadn't. Again, maybe if I were more dumb or something this would be easier to overlook.
Women that smoke. Ick. If I liked the taste of cigarettes, I'd smoke them myself. Who the hell wants a chick with a cigarette hanging out of their mouth? It smells like ass, and kills you. Great. As soon as I see an exceptionally hot chick light up, I say to myself, "see ya". I know that I probably didn't have a chance with her to begin with, but it makes me feel better about it, knowing that I wouldn't want to anyway.
I hate women that can't stand up for themselves. My best friend is engaged to a woman that is like that. You'll start getting into some sort of witty back and forth banter, and she'll look at him and say, "are you going to let him say that?". I mean, are you kidding? You can't joke? You don't have the intellect to come up with anything better than getting your boyfriend to tell me to stop?
I hate women that expect a relationship to just sort of happen without any effort or time commitment. The ones that are actually too busy for a relationship, but want one anyway. They sit there with their calendars booked, and constantly on the run with no time to date, but somehow feel that if they wish for it hard enough you will both date and get to know each other better. They don't want to sacrifice any of the other things they do to actually make time for this, they just sort of expect it to happen. Reality is foreign to them.
I think I may be too picky. I'm often reminded of the Seinfeld line, "70% of the population is undatable." I agree. I think it may be even worse than that. I have a friend, who now tells the women he dates up-front that he is simply waiting for them to go crazy. He tells them, "I know you're a woman, and so you're bound to go crazy, and so I'm just waiting for it to happen, but until it does, we can hang out and have fun." He's gotten his tired slashed twice within the last month by ex'es. Good times.
Then when I find a woman that may fit all of my qualifications, I get nervous. It's so rare that I see one, I think that I possibly panic. Sort of like if I saw a unicorn, or some other mythical creature. I have no idea what to say, and I never think they will like me. The girl I dated before my last girlfriend actually had to attack me halfway through the night because she got tired of waiting. She had the funniest line when I asked her about it: "Well there's only so much one can talk." Yes, she ended up being a little crazy, but she was very cool, and fun. She could never understand how I didn't think she would like me. She told me I was super smart, so of course she would like me.
I love women, and their ability to fall for a guy for all sorts of reasons, looks, money, brains, sense of humor, whatever. So many of them don't seem to be very picky. I wonder if they are forced to that - if there are just so few guys out there with the "whole package" that they are forced to accept what they can get.
As I read this post over, I notice that the things I have listed that I don't like in women are things that I wouldn't like in myself either. If I were fat and didn't work out, smoked like a chimney, and was dumb, maybe my standards would change. It seems I'm looking for a woman that has similar abilities, traits, and values as myself.
Dumb women, I can't stand them either. I don't think I'm exceptionally smart. I'm pretty sure there are a lot of people out there much smarter than I, but I hate communicating with a woman when all I can think of is how poorly they speak, write, or communicate. I'll be sitting there wanting to runaway and escape as quickly as possible. Praying that they are really smart on the inside, and that they are just nervous. A woman can be absolutely gorgeous, and then they open their mouth and you spend the rest of the night together wishing that they hadn't. Again, maybe if I were more dumb or something this would be easier to overlook.
Women that smoke. Ick. If I liked the taste of cigarettes, I'd smoke them myself. Who the hell wants a chick with a cigarette hanging out of their mouth? It smells like ass, and kills you. Great. As soon as I see an exceptionally hot chick light up, I say to myself, "see ya". I know that I probably didn't have a chance with her to begin with, but it makes me feel better about it, knowing that I wouldn't want to anyway.
I hate women that can't stand up for themselves. My best friend is engaged to a woman that is like that. You'll start getting into some sort of witty back and forth banter, and she'll look at him and say, "are you going to let him say that?". I mean, are you kidding? You can't joke? You don't have the intellect to come up with anything better than getting your boyfriend to tell me to stop?
I hate women that expect a relationship to just sort of happen without any effort or time commitment. The ones that are actually too busy for a relationship, but want one anyway. They sit there with their calendars booked, and constantly on the run with no time to date, but somehow feel that if they wish for it hard enough you will both date and get to know each other better. They don't want to sacrifice any of the other things they do to actually make time for this, they just sort of expect it to happen. Reality is foreign to them.
I think I may be too picky. I'm often reminded of the Seinfeld line, "70% of the population is undatable." I agree. I think it may be even worse than that. I have a friend, who now tells the women he dates up-front that he is simply waiting for them to go crazy. He tells them, "I know you're a woman, and so you're bound to go crazy, and so I'm just waiting for it to happen, but until it does, we can hang out and have fun." He's gotten his tired slashed twice within the last month by ex'es. Good times.
Then when I find a woman that may fit all of my qualifications, I get nervous. It's so rare that I see one, I think that I possibly panic. Sort of like if I saw a unicorn, or some other mythical creature. I have no idea what to say, and I never think they will like me. The girl I dated before my last girlfriend actually had to attack me halfway through the night because she got tired of waiting. She had the funniest line when I asked her about it: "Well there's only so much one can talk." Yes, she ended up being a little crazy, but she was very cool, and fun. She could never understand how I didn't think she would like me. She told me I was super smart, so of course she would like me.
I love women, and their ability to fall for a guy for all sorts of reasons, looks, money, brains, sense of humor, whatever. So many of them don't seem to be very picky. I wonder if they are forced to that - if there are just so few guys out there with the "whole package" that they are forced to accept what they can get.
As I read this post over, I notice that the things I have listed that I don't like in women are things that I wouldn't like in myself either. If I were fat and didn't work out, smoked like a chimney, and was dumb, maybe my standards would change. It seems I'm looking for a woman that has similar abilities, traits, and values as myself.
the line is actually "95% of the population is undatable..." (i'm a seinfeld fanatic, what can i say)...
ReplyDeletei don't think you're too picky. there's a lot of dumb, fat, weak women out there. but i also think there's a lot of smart, fun women who take pride in their bodies... you just gotta look harder. i think the former hangs out in obvious places, like bars and clubs, and the latter stays more hidden...
don't know what to tell you, except to keep on truckin'. she's out there.
I think it's good to be picky. You don't want to settle for something less than perfect for yourself. You only deserve the best J!
ReplyDeleteStupid smokers. How gross. :)
You make a lot of good points here, first let me say, I like your honesty.
ReplyDeleteFirst off, I am in awe that your best friends girlfriend actually says, "Are you going to let him say that?" What's he gonna do? Beat you up? That only worked in James Dean movies even then the distressed girl gave the look as though life would mow her down in 10 years if she couldn't be rescued.
On the topic of dumb women and dumb men, putting your index finger to your lips and saying, "Shhhhhhh" always works for me.
Your not superficial it sounds like what your looking for is someone who is your equal, which is exactly what we all should want. Someone who will push you as much as you push them to be their best.
Keep up the good fight.
You're on the right track with looking for someone similar to you. Nuff said. Other than that it's nice to hear that someone with your set of qualities has realistic expectations in someone else. The (monetarily) poor, fat, bald, smoking, uneducated shmuck (the NOT-SO-total package) who wants to be with the ridiculously hot, rich, clean, active, brilliant goddess (the total package) has his standards set just a bit too high.
ReplyDeleteDo people settle? Yeah, definitely, but I am sure it happens on both sides of the gender fence. As long as both parties are satisfied with the deal, it's usually ok.
I find it amusing that you were so judgemental of stephanie klein's blog about redheaded children and then suddenly here on your own blog, (in a very "stephanie fashion" one might also note), are you talking about your own superficial inclinations...
ReplyDeleteI'm just sayin...
The difference is red hair is a trait one can't change - an immutable trait, like skin color. The physical things I look for can be achieved by going to a gym.
ReplyDeleteI'm just curious if you've ever met any woman that met your standards. Available or not, have you ever met such a woman? I'm guessing you have, and she was married, taken, gay, or whatever, and so that's why you're not with her right now. But I think it's a good measure of whether your standards are realistic. If you've ever met one of them, then they DO exist. From there it's all about timing.
ReplyDeleteThats not exactly true. Some people are just fat and there's nothing they can do about. It is an unchangeable thing for them, unless they have the money to get gastric bypass...
ReplyDeleteAnonymous, that may or may not be true. However, I would hazard a guess that even if it is, the number of fat people out there with this condition is very small. (There will always be exceptions to generalizations.) However, even if what you say is true, it remains a chanagable trait, they need money to accomplish it, but that doesn't make it is impossible.
ReplyDelete